Relax

Yesterday was the first time in... well I'm not sure how long but, a long time that I was completely RELAXED! I was in my own little relaxed world! It was great. I literally have been stressed ever since I was pregnant with Manti. Trying to get ready for a new baby is a stressful thing. Then having a child pass away is beyond stressful! Your whole world crashes (like it should) and you have no idea what to do or where to begin. Ever since the day I gave birth to Manti I have been trying to relax. I went home from the hospital the night I had him so I could some what try to relax and feel comfortable in my own bed. I tossed and turned all night long for so many reasons.

 I was in a lot of pain(physical, mentally, and emotionally)

I missed my baby

I was waiting for my baby to cry in the night to get up and feed him

I was worried about Walker

I was prepared to be up all night

The very next morning I was up doing the unthinkable and planning a funeral for my little baby! WHAT! It didn't seem real. I couldn't wrap my head around it! (What parent can really?) It seemed so unreal. I never really was able to just rest and really think about what just happened. It was go time. Time that I didn't want to happen but it had to be done.

Sometimes we don't know why things like this happen but you just have to GO WITH IT. You have to put your full trust in the Lord and know that there is a time of everything and there is a plan of everything. You have to have faith. Faith to know that you will be reunited. Strength and endurance to push through all the heartache and pain and live through it. You will realize that you have so much more in you then you know! Its amazing what the Lord can and will do for you if you put your trust in him and believe in his work.

Walker and I have been on the go ever since. Walker has been doing an awesome amazing job providing for our little family with work and school. He has never stopped believing that there is always an answer to everything if you pray! ( We pray a lot in this family!) I have been busy helping my cool, hip, awesome grandma! She keeps me busy but I wouldn't want to be doing anything else! I love getting paid in blessings! We have never had time to just go somewhere and RELAX! So yesterday we didn't waste anytime and went straight to the beach. Just the two of us. Holding hands, laughing, smiling, and just being us. Laying on the beach getting a little sun kissed and listening to the ocean.. We were in a little piece of relaxed heaven. WE LOVED IT! 

We loved our day yesterday.. Woke up to a warm day! We went and saw Walkers grandpa, dad, and uncle and the office. Went to the Kona temple to check out the new waterfall. Hung out with with his momma! Went to lunch and his grandma and mom. Then BEACH! Then watched the sunset from the lanai. Ended with dinner and bonding time with Walker's brother Alema. It was nothing but a relaxed nice day. Nothing to worry about and all smiles. We love being HOME!